Vertical Clitoral Hood Piercing as Reclamation

At A Glance Author Judy Contact XgingaX@erols.com Artist 'Eric' Studio Enigma Studio Location Richmond VA

As a survivor of sexual assault, I find it extremely difficult to express anything but hatred for myself, and in particular my sexual organs. Since I was attacked, the thought of even -looking- at or touching myself brings on feelings of disgust and self-hatred. Going to therapy for years helped me deal with issues of grief and violation, but still I felt as if my vagina was not something that belonged to me any longer.

I started thinking about piercing as a way of taking back my body while reading something here on BME, but didn't seriously consider it for a while. Playing with the idea, I read everything available online about genital piercing, and decided to go for a clitoral hood piercing.

Of all the places where piercings performed that I've visited, my favorite is Enigma Studio, about two blocks up from my apartment. It's where I had my tongue pierced in August, and just has a really relaxed atmosphere. Some studios make me feel kind of awkward and anxious, like I don't fit in being my pseudo-conservative self, but Enigma is really nice. Everyone communicated with me really well, answering questions and letting my get relaxed, etc.

So I went in and told the man at the front desk what I was considering, and that I had some questions about it and was feeling kind of nervous. After explaining the procedure, he told me to hang on while he got someone who could tell me about it first-hand. He returned with a woman who worked there who told me "It's a really intense two-second piercing, but absolutely worth it," and told me it was her favorite piercing((and damn she had a lot)).

She also recommended that I have it done vertically, and with a barbell, because that tends to sit better on the clitoris, and provides more stimulation.

I smiled and thanked her and turned back to the guy I first chatted with, and told him I was totally excited, and asked when it would be good to do it (wasn't sure if an appointment was necessary for something like that). "Well, if you're free, I can do it now," he said, and somewhere in there introduced himself as 'Eric'.

I was ready to go. It cost about $60, which was less than my tongue ring, I think because it's smaller jewelry. Ah well. Also, I don't know if it's preferred by piercers that you shave your pubic hair, but I'd done so that morning just in case.

He took me into the same room where I'd had my tongue done, and said "I'm locking the door so that no one will barge in, is that ok with you?".

Nervousness rising from butterflies in my stomach transformed into a frog in my throat, and I just nodded quickly while he showed me the after-care sheet explaining to wash antibacterial soap, and salt water.

"If you will, sit on the table, please, hike up the skirt and spread 'em," he instructed. Well, I guess I should have expected it, but I was still hesitant. He turned his back to gather all the materials, and I did it. (!?)

So it was do-or-die time. He sat on a chair at the edge of the table, and pulled my feet on his thighs, which was really the most uncomfortable part of the whole ordeal. It was really uncomfortable, and I was worried that thinking about what I was going through with would trigger some kind of panic or something, but it really didn't, because while getting everything cleaned and marked, my piercer told me what he was doing, trying to get me to relax. Very nice.

Laying on my back, staring at the ceiling, my arms above my head gripping the edge of table behind me, I breathed deeply, and counted out loud to three as he'd instructed.

"Here's the needle," he warned, and at the same time I cried "oooooowww" until I felt it finish passing through my flesh. Apparently, I'd tensed up and tried to draw my legs together, because he told me to relax 'em again so he could fasten the bottom of the barbell on.

"That's it," Eric told me. I probably wasn't in the room for a full fifteen minutes even. I laid down for a while, and he held the mirror so that I could see the little barbell. DAMN it looks so much bigger resting on my genitalia than it did in the little baggie.

But that was the first time I'd looked at my vagina in four years and my god it looked beautiful.

Since I wasn't feeling too dizzy, and it wasn't hurting anymore, I pulled my dress back down and tipped my piercer. "Thanks, you're awesome," I told him before scurrying out the door and just about floating home on the endorphins and adrenaline rush ((YES I was able to walk, heh.))

And that is the story of my clitoral hood piercing. I haven't examined it too much since it was pierced, because I don't want any germs to get on it, and I'm a little nervous, but I'm really happy with it.

I don't know how my therapist is going to react when I tell her, or what my boyfriend will think of it, but I definitely feel much more at ease with myself now, and for the first time in ages feel as though that region of my body is exclusively mine again, and I highly recommend any woman this piercing.