I've stretched my own lobes to 1/2", pierced my own nostril, and had my septum and labret done. But whenever someone asked me about nipples or whenever I saw pierced nipples I still would cringe. And then I read in a magazine that nipples were the most painful, even worse than genitals. Still over time I started to get curious. Could it really be that bad?
At A Glance Author wank Contact wank@bme.anon When Six months ago Artist me Studio bathroom Location near my sink Eventually I became obsessed and knew I had to have it done. Problem is, my experience with professional piercers up to that point had been shitty. One guy did my septum too low, another guy did my labret off center. I eventually took them both out, the piercings, not the piercers. I figured I could do at least as good a job as they did. Months earlier I had successfully done my nostril, as well as two ear holes years earlier. I read enough and had seen enough pictures that I knew the procedure well.
I bought some forceps, a few 14g needles, a 14g 1/2" CBR, and some EMLA. Looking back, I should have gotten a bigger diameter CBR (more on that later) and realized that I probably spent more money on tools than I would have spent to get it done professionally. Everything came in and I put it on the shelf and procrastinated for awhile.
I finally decided to do it one Saturday night. I read the EMLA directions about 50 times and squeezed about half the tube on my left nipple just as Saturday Night Live was coming on. I knew the EMLA had to stay on for two hours or so and figured the show was a good starting point. I was dismayed to find that the patch that came with the cream wasn't self-adhesive (like the directions made it sound) so I covered the patch with medical tape. The medical tape sucked so I just covered the whole thing with duct tape and duct taped it to my chest so it would all stay airtight. Then I pounded some coffee to stay awake during an especially boring SNL.
About 40 minutes after the show ended I got to work. Took the bandage off, along with some chest hair, and poked my nipple to see how numb it was. I could feel it but it still felt kind of numb, like when you poke your leg after it falls asleep. I put on some rubber gloves because I knew my hands would be sweating, marked my nipple with the dots about 1/2" apart, wrapped a rubber band around the arms of the forceps so they would stay tight and I could hold them with one hand. I lubed up the needle with some Neosporin and put a cork against the exit side of the forceps. I don't know how I held onto all of this with only two hands.
I shoved the needle through moderately fast and was pretty happy that it didn't hurt that bad, although the effects of the EMLA wore off immediately after the needle went through. I was surprised that I hit both marks perfectly. The needle felt really tight and I wish I had used a better lube. Looking down at a needle jabbed through my nipple seemed really unnatural and I felt like I was going to puke. Not because it hurt or it was gross or I was having second thoughts. It just seemed wrong and unnatural.
Getting the ring in was really difficult since the ring and needle were both the same gauge and I was pretty inexperienced. I remembered when I pierced my right ear with a safety pin ten years earlier and how difficult it was to find the hole after I took the safety pin out and tried to get the earring in. Also my hands were shaking from the adrenaline. So after a few half-assed attempts to push the needle out of my nipple with the ring, I just said fuck it and did it in one motion. No blood and only a little throbbing. I snapped in the bead and cleaned up.
Within a few weeks the ring kind of settled in. Like I said, the inside diameter of the ring was kind of too small so the bottom of both holes grew slightly closer to accommodate the size. Six months later I still measure the distance just to make sure it's not migrating and it doesn't appear to be.
Three weeks after I did my left nipple I tried to do my right one. I set up exactly the same but I couldn't get it centered so I took it out right after. A week later I did it crooked again so I took it out again. I realized that I was just lucky that I got the first one so straight. So I will probably have the right side done professionally after I find someone good to do it. Also, it hurt progressively worse each time I tried to do my right one. The EMLA didn't work at all by the last time. It was also kind of hard to keep the forceps deep enough, they kept slipping off. It I did attempt it again I would probably just use a needle and a cork.
The experience was a positive one and I felt a lot more satisfaction than if I had just wandered into a shop and paid someone to do it. I am interested in having my right one done professionally just so I can compare procedures and see what he/she thinks of the job I did.