When I went to get a labret, I expected it to hurt a little bit, but I never expected that I would end up on a couch with my legs in the air, with a german woman slapping me in the face before I puked in a trash can.
At A Glance Author anonymous Contact anonymous@bme.anon When A year ago Artist ? Studio Jutta's Location Aachen, Germany I was on a visit to Germany when some friends and I decided to go into a piercing shop. A friend of mine wanted a lip web piercing, and I had been getting geared up to get a labret. It was to be my first piercing, other than a few holes in my ears and plugs. After my friend got her stuff done, I went to get my labret.
I sat down and the piercer marked a dot on my lip. I asked to look at it and noted that it seemed a little off-center. In broken english she told me that this was so as not to disturb a nerve that ran down the center of my lip. This seemed reasonable to me, and I thought back to a friend of mine back in the U.S. who had a slightly off-center labret as well. His was the only one I had really ever stared at, so I assumed they were all off-center. (Later, it turned out that he had actually been pierced at the same place by the same woman two years before-- what are the odds?) Anyway, I settled back and she pierced it. Surprised by the lack of pain, I went to get up and she said, once again in a mix of german and english, that I may want to sit down. I ignored this and went out to the waiting area to greet my friends.
I didn't get far, though, before I felt like I was going to pass out. My friends said something like, "hey, looks good" as I walked right past them onto the street. It was raining outside and about 50 degrees, but I was burning up. I took off my sweatshirt and balled it up, using it as a pillow as I pressed myself against the ground. My friend came out and told me that I shouldn't be lying there, and made me lean on her. Feeling a little better, I decided I needed some water and got to my feet. By the time I set foot back in the store, though, I knew I was going to throw up. Frantically I slurred "where's the bathroom" as I collapsed. The next thing I knew I was on a leather couch with my legs in the air. I had knocked over a partition that was meant to give the tattooing area some privacy, and a large german woman had slapped me back to consciousness. A horrified german couple was staring at me open-mouthed, and my friends were all gathered over me. In my confused haze, I f elt that they needed to leave and told them so very respectfully. I then puked in a trash can, felt better, paid, and left.
In retrospect, I'm glad that I did that, because the labret was horribly off-center, and it was seventy euros.
Apparently what the piercer was trying to do was to line the piercing up with my nose, but this is a very stupid idea. It was very clear that it was to the right, especially when I sucked my lips into a fish face (which I have a tendency to do while driving with no cigarettes). A woman in Amsterdam kindly told me that the problem with my labret was not only that it was pierced off-center, but also at an extreme angle, meaning that it was too high on the inside, and went from the left side of my inner lip to the right side of my outer lip. I would think this piercer was just a crazy woman off the street or something, except that she unfortunately got to my friend as well. Now, the jewelry is gone and I just have an off-center hole in my mouth.
I've learned a lot from this experience-- that you should know a lot about your piercing (or tattoo, or whatever else) before you get it, and that you should make sure to listen when your piercer or tattoo artist tells you to sit the fuck down after you get pierced. I don't know why I passed out, exactly, but I know that if I had laid down and had some water or something for a couple minutes instead, I would have avoided being an absolute dumbass afterwards. It's also a good idea to know something about the place where you get something done. That isn't to say that all walk-ins won't turn out okay, but just that you can end up paying seventy euros to puke in a trash can. I think I could've done that for free.