I had been fantasizing about a septum piercing for months. Finally, I decided to do it. But I feared I was not anatomically suited for it. I have very little flesh at the end of my nose and it tends upward. My nose is too long to be called "ski-jump," but it does tend upward and I'm tall and I need to be able to hide it. I went to see my new favorite piercer, the beautiful Jessica at Saints and Sinners and told her what I wanted and what my concerns were. With her excellent bedside manner, Jessica took me back, felt up my nose, and assured me that I would be able to hide a retainer just fine. She also said that she just loved her own septum piercing. All right, I was sold.
At A Glance Author Pushing50 Contact Pushing50@bme.anon When N/A Artist Jessica Studio Saints & Sinners Location Baltimore, MD She sat me down, set things up. She took special clamps with a tiny hole and found my sweet spot. After asking if I was ready and telling me to take a deep breath, she went to work. There was a slight pinch and she said, "There!" What?!? Suddenly, when I looked cross-eyed and down, I could see a needle through my nose. The pain was so slight it would almost be an exaggeration to say it hurt. Okay, I thought, the painful part is when she slides in the jewelry. But no, that was even less pain. In a moment, I had a septum piercing!
"That was almost anti-climactic," I told her. She smiled. We chatted a little and she made sure I was okay—the only disappointment was that the endorphin rush was small, since the whole thing was so painless—and she let me go (with aftercare and a can of H2Ocean, which I now swear by. I gave her a tip and she laughed and said, "See you again." She knows I'm hooked.
The only hitch was when I needed to do some errands where a septum piercing would not be cool (i.e., might run in to neighbors or kids' friends' parents) and I tried to flip up my retainer—and couldn't! I had to high-tail it home and grab each end of the retainer with a pair of pliers and pull it a bit wider. Also, I learned that if I flip it up one side at a time, it is easier. I just have a weird-shaped nose. I kicked myself for not trying the flip up, flip down maneuver when I was still in the shop. My bad.
But now it goes up and down like anything. And really, now ten hours later, nothing. Only the slightest dull throb, a tiny bit of runny nose when I went to a martial arts workout this evening. No bleeding, no pain. I almost forget it's there. When it's up it's totally invisible (contrary to my fears). You would have to look straight up my nose to see it—and who wants to do that? And yet I can bring it down, as I have it now, and rock it when I want.
Healing has been just as easy. Other than a brief bloody nose when I took a transatlantic flight 2 days after getting pierced, I have had no troubles. Less than a month later, I tapered it up to 12 g and put a horseshoe ring in it—again, painless. Not sure about this—it may be too big and the little thrill of having something quite substantial up there may wear off. In a week or two, I'll probably stretch up again to a 10g retainer. I'm not planning on going really big with this one (but then again, who knows? <g>).
So there remains the question of why a middle-aged man with family feels the need to pierce his septum. Am I trying to be "cool" and look like all the hip 20-somethings? Is it a middle-aged crisis (septum piercing as poor-man's Porsche)? Sorry to burst your bubble, but no. Hardly anyone is going to see this piercing, in fact. Yeah, I'll flash it from time to time, but I expect it will remain "up" most of the time. My wife may never know about it, and I'll try to keep it from my kids. It's really just for me.
Unusual jewelry helps me focus, somehow, and it also helps me appreciate the mundane elements of being a dad. I don't know how to describe it, but I just love reading bedtime stories with the knowledge that I have several hunks of steel in me in places that would send my boring professional neighbors into fits. It reminds me how fun it is to do the normal boring duties of husband, father, employee. If it's not too high-falutin', I might say that having body piercings helps me appreciate the mundane details of my life as important experiences—they remind me to pay attention to the details of what I do every day.