Ah a brisk October afternoon and I go to get to get my weekly tattoo session. I arrive only to realize I hadn't checked my voice-mail that day and that my tattoo artist was unable to make it. Hmmm, conundrum. My septum was the only piercing I had ever really wanted and lucky for me, Puck the sometimes verbose piercer was in, as always. So I asked him how much "this" was grabbing at my septum. I agreed to his price and used my tattoo fund for the week, telling him I wanted a an open ended piercing so I could hide it from work and parents. At the time I was 19 and living in my own apartment about half an hour from home, so hiding from my Mom who absolutely hated body enhancements of all sort, would only have to happen every so often, to this day she still doesn't know I'm pierced but hates my tattoos and can't even will herself to think about them, yeah that much. Anywho Puck knew I was no stranger to pain as he had seen Renee, my tattoo artist, tattoo my whole chest/belly while I giggled and laughed like a schoolgirl, thus my common title to onlooking customers, Painproof. He decided a 12 gauge would work and would be easy to hide, I had to be at work in 2 days so flipping would have to be doable soon.
At A Glance Author ShavenSquirrel Contact shavensquirrel@gmail.com When Six months ago Artist Puck Studio Lucky Lady Location Lexington Kentucky On to the piercing process. I have never had a piercing in my entire life of any kind, ever. So my septum seemed a strange place to start, however, as I said, it was the only piercing I had ever wanted. As much as I have been tattooed I was incredibly nervous about the pain to follow, he had me lye down on the table and made a lot of really bad jokes, a common Puck quality, and told me when I felt him press against my head he was "Gonna put a hole in me" I saw the jewelry and the needle and just got shaky and more nervous. The actual process was quick and only had one or two seconds of intense pain,one single tear fell as the needle went through as well a single drop of blood, but as usual, I didn't squirm and sat perfectly still. The jewelry was a bit crooked which he said would correct itself soon. It was sore to the touch and I dreaded flipping it, although the first time he showed me and I did myself right after the piercing it wasn't bad at all. So, I cleaned it frequently over the next 2 days and was wary of the dry puss that would accumulate and didn't bother moving the jewelry around much.
Work. That day had come and I woke up an hour before I had to be at work, and proceeded to flip the ring. Being the smart-ass I am I figured I would just push on the balls and force it up my nose. While I pushed the ring stretched the hole and moved it a bit causing the worst pain of my life, the dry puss scraping he inside of the hole felt like the needle going in again, but rusted and jagged and the forward stretching of my nose wasn't pleasant either. However, it went up and all pain quickly subsided, go me, I go work, I feel the ring in my nose always and go to bathroom after my shift and press on my nostrils till the ring pops out to the amazement of any co-workers in the bathroom and walk out for all to see my amazing act of defyment of the dress code the minute I clock out.
I continue this way until for a few weeks, soon the pain stops and puss quits building up and body accepts a loss, willpower over pain for the win. At this point I'm able to play with the jewelry to my hearts content and end up finding the easy way(the way my piercer had told me) to flip the jewelry, that is: sliding it to one side, and pushing the big part up, which is not painful at all in comparison to the way I was doing it which still hurt a little each time I did it. With this method I got very quick at pulling the ring in and out and would do so in the break-room constantly, scaring the hell out of the older workers(I worked at a Wal-Mart) this pleased me to no extent and would keep me entertained all day.
Then comes the stretching. I remember to myself a picture I had seen of a guy with his pinky finger through his septum and said to myself "I HAVE to do that" and decided I would stretch my septum.
The next day I went to the local head shop/body jewelry store and bought two 10 gauge rings, this was about 3 months after my initial piercing. They were both the same type of ring as before, open with 2 screw on beads, and I figured I would just force it through, I did just that with no real pain and was like "That was easy" and the next day I went and bought a 10 gauge ring.
With the 10 gauge I once again just forced it through, a slight bit of pain with enough soreness to make me wait about a week or so until I tried an 8 gauge.
Ah the 8 gauge the first one that really hurt. I bought an 8 gauge tusk stretcher and the same type of ring I had been using just 8 gauge. Me and some friends had a party that night, anticipating pain this time I got a couple drinks in me and proceeded to force in the tusk. The best way to describe it? Being punched in the face in slow motion. After that the night turned into a blur of pain and a few more drinks before I passed out on my bed. I woke up the next day in a slight bit of pain and decided to put the regular jewelry in, the tusk didn't like coming out, but as soon as I pulled it out the stainless steel ring slid in effortlessly, stupid tusk and its high friction material. The ring presented a problem, it was really hard to fit up my nose and didn't stay up there well. This just made me want a 6 gauge.
The 6 gauge. For the 6 I decided that I wouldn't be able to shove it up my nose so I bought a CBR and an a plastic spacer with o-rings. The CBR having tapered edges was nice and easily(and painfully) slid in. The damned bead however was a bitch to snap in and made me wear the spacer in all the time. The spacer was wonderful, it weighed nothing and couldn't be seen by Mom and made the healing go really fast. Now it was time for a 4 gauge.
New roommates, new gauge. My new roomies had lots of tattoos and tons of piercings, one of them had his lobes up half an inch so had a lot of extra rings lying around and one day gave me a 4 CBR and said it was time. Of course I had to then, I was on the spot. So, we went to the bathroom and he watched me force a 4 gauge CBR in my septum, I didn't squirm much just scrunched my face once and let out an "Oooo" as it slid in. Ouch, but not unbearable. The ring was heavy, and swung around a lot, causing me to bactine it up constantly. Once again puss formed and dried and when the ring moved it felt like it was ripping me open. I bought a 4 gauge spacer the next day and was in heaven. I later bought a 4 gauge ring like the others I had because I hated the damn beads. Soon I could play and tug on the ring and freak the squares once more, and was ready for a 2 gauge.
Conundrum. All the 2 gauge rings that weren't CBRs were fucking huge and would just look silly, so I kicked myself and bought a CBR and a plastic spacer. Once again my roommate watched me gauge my septum and cringed while I was once more humble about the pain. The guy that was working on 2 inches on his lobes said he would never get his septum that big. The pain and healing for the 2 gauge was a week of hell, it was sore seemingly forever and the jewelry took and incredible amount of time to be comfy. To my luck, that day came, and I got really good at snapping in the bead, boy was I a freak show now, the stares I got, marvelous, and when people asked "Is that real?" I would happily say "Yup" as I tugged hard on it from side to side for their disgust and my sheer enjoyment. A few months had passed and I decided it was time to play with the big boys and went shopping for an acceptable 0 gauge.
Ah, the zero gauge. Once again the rings I wanted were all gigantic, I ended up picking a Stainless Steel Pincher and a plastic threaded spacer with screw on sides, excellent I thought as the damned o-rings on the 2 fell out all the time, especially during that week I was sick with the cold. The Pincher was nice as it was small on either side and went up to 0, it had o-rings to hold it in place although I suspected they wouldn't be entirely necessary. Once again my roommate had to watch, especially excited this time at the noticeable difference in size from the 2. I greased up the 0 with bactine, cleaned my hole with a q-tip which now went right through hole to my enjoyment and began the stretch. This was the worst pain yet. How can I describe it? A weird kind of pressure you can almost hear as a high pitched noise in your head, my cringing face, a single tear falling, when I finally got to the end it slid rather easily on the 0 section, putting the o-rings on was difficult, my nose was very sore. I made the mistake of putting it in a few hours before I would try and sleep, the pain was so intense I couldn't sleep. I eventually got up, very painfully took out the pincher to see blood pouring out in fat globs, a few tissues and about 10 q-tips later I put the 2 spacer back in, blood dried around it, and i feared taking it back out, thus the ripping dried blood feeling back. The next day I visited my Mom, she saw a very tiny piece of dry blood I had missed, and asked if I had a nose bleed, I lied and said yes, she said it looked like I had a giant black booger in my nose, the o-ring. The o-ring was sticking out a little because of my sensitive hole, I went the bathroom and blew my nose as she watched and avoided well lit rooms for the duration of the stay. Success, I left the house and Mom was none the wiser. A few weeks later I felt confident I could get that damned hunk of metal in my nose, so I went to the bathroom and rammed it back in. It was quick that time and I heard a tiny slipping pop noise kind of like when a snot bubble pops. I knew then I had broken a scab. I tried to sleep again that night to no avail, once again pain so intense I couldn't sleep. I took it out to one or two drops of blood and put the 2 spacer back in and slept, defeated. It has been a few good months since then and I'm determined to get the pincher in. Lately I've been cleaning my nose extra well and trying my hand at jamming Bic pens through it, one of which I nearly succeeded. At this point I knew I was ready. I took the pincher, went to the bathroom and forced it through once again. The process of me forcing it in takes less than a minute, like a band-aid I would rather it happen fast. That was about 2 hours ago, it doesn't feel as bad as the other times. I have 2 days off work to let the hole get used to its new size before I try my hand at the spacer.
So there you have it, I got my septum pierced in October and in 7 months I've gotten it up to a 0 gauge. I praise my high pain tolerance and am proud that my mind can beat my body, maybe someday soon I'll stick my pinky through and give a little wave to my horrified co-workers.