At A Glance
Author	Dirk Chivers
Contact	Dirk Chivers@bme.anon
When	It just happened
Artist	Derek
Studio	Blue Buddha Tattoo
Location	Burlington, VT, U$A

I've wanted a septum for sometime now, this seems to be often the case with most people getting a piercing, but anyway, I wanted one for a long time. I'd been asking my partner and friends what they thought of septums for a while, after finally getting some support for the idea of my big nose with some metallic accessorization I proceeded to cruise BME septum galleries and experiences for appropriate sizes. I could not locate this supposed "sweet spot" so often discussed in the experiences so I was not sure what gauge my nose would comfortably accommodate, but I knew for sure that I wanted something larger that 14gauge. Having reasoned that Derek, whom I knew through my past tattooing experience through Blue Buddha, was most certainly knowledgeable and qualified to ascertain where the spot and what gauge it would fit, I decided that he could figure that sort of thing out for me.

Having had a particularly stressful week, and was looking forward to a stressful weekend because of a transgender conference I was involved in planning (the Translating Identity Conference at UVM) I wanted to get this piercing in on Thursday of Friday as a sort of reward for having worked my ass off. I called into the shop on Thursday night hoping to speak to Derek, but I got my usually tattoo artist who informed me that Derek had left for the night, and that he knew nothing about the piercing and that I best of coming in Friday morning to get things done as Derek was open then. I was a little bummed having to wait, but the next morning was fine anyway as I did not have any classes until 230pm so I could certainly fit the appointment into my schedule.

I walked into the shop at about noon and Derek was there and eagerly jumped up to talk about my plans. He talked me through the ins and outs of the piercing, the spot, the pain, jewelry possibilities, then explained the process of the piercing and gave me the run down of what aftercare was specific to this piercing. He knows his shit when it comes to aftercare. He then donned gloves and felt around my nose, and then, having found the spot, he said I could basically have any size septum I wanted (12g), and that pain and healing time would be easily dealt with as the tissue was fairly thin (huge relief). He asked me about what I wanted for the jewelry, to which I responded that I had hoped I could wear a retainer as I kind of wanted it hidden until it was healed, he said that was actually a good choice as the retainer can stay in place for a long time and is less prone to being played with or bumped accidentally. He then switched gloves and pulled out his box or retainers and when over the two different styles he had in stock, which were the standard staple shaped variety and the kind that also looks like a staple but has ends which flare out, which Derek said that he preferred as they were less likely to aggravate the tissue of my nose. I went with his suggestion. He brought everything to the autoclave and said it would be about 30 minutes until he could start the piercing.

The autoclaving period took longer than he said as some customers came in to inquire about a piercing, but this was fine as I have been to this shop before and I was talking to my tattoo artist for most of that time anyway (Aaron Riel) and we took care of all the paper work. So the machine dinged, or whatever it does, and we got down to business. He put on more gloves and cleaned all surfaces, then put on new gloves and cleaned out my nose and marked me up and checked for alignment. Before this point I was not nervous at all, but then at that point looking at how big 12 gauge actually was, I started to get really nervous, but Derek talked me through everything and all was fine. He finished marking and prepared everything else, then shed his gloves and pulled out some purple hyper sanitized gloves (I don't know what exactly what was so special about them but they were in a special wrapper). He then lined the needle up and talked me through the breathing and got me to relax a bit and take deep breaths, he waited about 3 minutes for me toe finally calm down and then he went through. It was definitely not as bad as I had anticipated, but it made my eyes water for sure, with was just so strange and I could feel him pushing and then the needle almost popping through the other side. He then very quickly switched the needle for the retainer and cleaned me up a bit and let me take a look, it was absolutely perfectly straight. He then cleaned up a bit more and then pinched the retainer with pliers to better fit my nose and then flipped it up. He then talked about the purple ink line left on my nose from lining up the piercing, needless to say I was not particularly happy about him saying that it would take two days to fully come off, I had a conference to run and a purple line would look a little silly, but I decided that I could live as I was very happy with the piercing itself, and that's what matters in the end.

We went over aftercare again, in more detail this time, what I should and should not do with my nose (including an amusing story about someone who asked if she could snort cocaine with a fresh septum piercing), and future jewelry and stretching options. I paid and left, very happy with my experience. I'm starting to feel pretty comfortable in the shop, as I've actually gotten to know people pretty well over my year of 6 visits, as of right now. I will be back. For anyone in the Burlington/Chittenden County area, Derek is by far the most knowledgeable and affable piercer I've come across, so go to him for all your piercing needs.

And for Derek, if you're reading this, that purple line comes right off with Clean and Clears Acne Astringent. Oh, and I'm working on the paper right now.