I have three regrets. The first is eating that plate of chili mushrooms at a friend's farewell vegan barbeque after my septum piercing. The sensation of fire, the blood and the tears that did not appear during the piercing process ran down my face in rivulets. Mine was the only blood at the barbeque.
At A Glance Author michaelmouse Contact michaelmouse@bme.anon IAM michaelmouse When It just happened Artist Andrew Studio Adrenaline Body Piercing PTY LTD Location McKellar, Canberra, ACT, Australia The second regret is piercing whilst I had a cold. True, I had thought I had beaten it and had been taking vitamin C and eating garlic in order to boost my immune system. In fact, when I walked into the Adrenaline Body Piercing I was feeling better than I had in a week. Two days later I am soaking my nose in warm salty water and cleaning out mucus with a cotton bud. No infection though, so I am happy.
The third is that no matter what I do, my father insults me about it. He always has and now I know he always will. When I had long hair it was too long, when short too short, my shirt too pink, my aftershave "girly", my hair color too etc. After the vegan barbeque I went to my cousin's son's second birthday party. Whereupon my father told me he loves me but that I looked "F'ing stupid." I just added this to the ever growing list of things Dad disapproves of and moved on. If at 33 years old I am still worried about what my father thinks then that is the real shame.
The search for the perfect piercing for me took months. Firstly, I needed to let my tattoo heal, so that I could concentrate on one form of after care at a time. Then I needed to let my wallet heal after the beating it took from the tattoo. I really recommend to everyone that they save weekly towards their piercing and tattoos rather than emptying their bank account. In so doing you have time to check out different piercers and tattooists and to find the one with the cleanest premises, most experience and best articulated aftercare. As far as I am concerned money should never be the motivation for the size or look of your body modification. Instead, patience and careful saving allows you to get what you actually want, where you want it and in the place most suited to your needs. For me that meant a septum piercing with a retainer as I work with intellectually disabled children and will need to hide the piercing until it heals.
I chose Adrenaline Body Piercing by reputation. Chiefly, that is where my partner Jewels went for her nose piercing. Also, Andrew's reputation for consistently excellent results over many years attracted me. Incidentally, he has a reputation for being a little cold towards some people and a bit un-talkative, but I have not heard anyone complain about his professionalism. I also knew that Andrew's piercing jewelry is of high quality sterilized in an autoclaved. But I won't lie; I was also intrigued to meet this man who pierces in a basement studio of a domestic dwelling and who has the voice of an ACT public servant, soft and polite.
When Jewel's rang to make our appointments, hers a firm booking for a labret and mine a tentative one for a septum, Andrew rearranged other engagements to allow us to be finished in time to pick our daughter up from gymnastics. Upon arrival, we rang the bell of an attractive suburban home with a nice view of the surrounding valley. The door which was badly in need of some paint was answered by a friendly Tommy Lee look-alike with a handsome septum piercing. As we descended into the dark timbered bowels of this outwardly respectable house I pondered on the nature of respectability. Inside this suburban home something magical but not respectable was taking place; the body adornment and modification of consenting adults by a consummate professional. Statistically speaking, however, some of the "respectable" homes nearby would contain "respectable" people assaulting each other and perpetrating the unspeakable against the un-consenting. Make you think don't it.
We turned right into the brightly lit waiting area, where we signed the consent forms and read the excellent aftercare handouts that were specific to the modifications we were receiving. Andrew then chatted in a friendly way with us and explained the benefits and hazards of the different piercings and jewelry. We all laughed together and joked about the banker that gets angry at Andrew if any of the money is facing the wrong way and tests every third note for forgery. I apologized in advance for problems that the bend in my five dollar note was sure to cause and Andrew laughed heartily.
The laugher and chat continued into the studio, and Andrew and I discussed our respective jobs and interests as he showed me the surgical packaging around the piercing implements and jewelry. After that Andrew became focused on concentrating, preparing and explaining the process to me. Each step of the way he informed me what was happening and checked that I was comfortable. The clamping of my septum was firm but not painful. I felt the needle enter, travel through my nose and come out the other side but the process was virtually painless and I had only the smallest tear well up in one eye. Afterwards, Andrew got me a glass of water and resumed his friendly chat and explained the need for spending time seated for much of the day in case of faintness.
As we drove away I pondered the handsomeness of my new adornment and the magic of body modification in general. I also make a specific prayer asking that I never hide unspeakable cruelty under a veneer of respectability but remain tattooed, pierced and committed to kindness. Oh yeah, and I pray I don't eat chili mushrooms for at least two months.