I've had a fear of needles for a long time. I vividly remember my many issues dealing with immunizations for school, not to mention getting my wisdom teeth removed when I was sixteen. The oral surgeon I went to was very intolerant. He stabbed the IV needle into my wrist despite my pleading which cause me to jerk and it ended up tearing out. If I had been smarter, I would have gotten up and walked out. Since that day, I haven't just been afraid of needles; have been terrified of needles. Seeing them on TV would cause me to hyperventilate. People talking about them would make me nauseous, and I would generally have to leave.
At A Glance Author Lindsay Contact Lindsay@bme.anon When A year ago Artist Reverend Ryan Studio The Hole Look Location Anchorage, AK Over Thanksgiving weekend, 2003, my boyfriend was talking about a friend that had gotten a piercing at a shop in town; he was debating getting his nipples pierced. He said I should get something done. I laughed; he knows about my phobia, I would never get something done! I was done with the conversation though, my stomach had lurched when he said that, and I felt light headed.
Later that night, while I couldn't sleep, I began to ponder what it might be like to subject myself to a needle. Should I get something pierced? I thought about it late into the night, and ultimately decided I couldn't go through with it.
The next day I was in my Abnormal Psychology class, and we happened to be talking about phobias. One method of treating phobias is called flooding; exposing the subject to what they are afraid of until they are completely used to it. Wow, now that just might work. My decision was almost instantly reversed, and I decided to look into what I wanted pierced. As soon as class got out, I got on the internet to research.
Searching for piercing information on the internet turned out to be a lot easier that I expected. I was instantly led to BME where I got to peruse any and every piercing I was the least bit interested in, not to mention ones I had never heard of before. (What's an ampallang? ... Oh... Oh wow. THAT'S and ampallang.) The best part was the experiences. Hearing people tell it how it was for them is really what made my decision final. I didn't have anyone to ask, so this was the next best thing.
I decided on a nostril piercing. It seemed painless enough, and I thought I would look good. I'd seen so many nose piercings, and I thought they were class and cute. Then I researched it. Everything I could get my hands on, I read. Jewelry type, aftercare, possible risks/complications, I had it all covered. Now I just had to ready myself.
The day came too soon for me. My boyfriend had decided on a day for me, because he knew I would never make a date myself. He scheduled it so he would have a day off afterwards because he was getting his nipples pierced too. I was nervous the entire day. I got nothing done at work. I was jumpy, fidgety, I scared easily, constantly tapping my foot or a pencil... it was horrible.
My boyfriend picked me up from work, and we went for an early dinner. He stressed the importance of needing to eat before hand, so you don't pass out. I couldn't eat much, but
I made myself as much as I could. I didn't want to pass out and look like a wimp.
We got to the shop, The Hole Look, and went to the counter. It wasn't too busy, so after the paperwork, ID, and payment, we were up. Ryan a.k.a. "Rev" (short for Reverend Ryan) asked who wanted to go first, and I decided it better be me. If I watched my boyfriend, chances are I would chicken out.
Ryan could tell how nervous I was. But he was incredibly understanding. He had to ask me more than once to stop shaking my feet. I sat on my hands so I wouldn't be able to use them. This was just from sitting on the table. I noticed how clean the room was. I was sitting on a doctors exam table! It even smelled clean. That made me more comfortable.
Rev explained the procedure thoroughly, and gave me time to breathe for a few minutes. He marked my nose, asked me if it looked good. I asked him to move it closer to the crease, and he did. Perfect.
He inserted the receiving tube into my nose, explaining again as he went. I clenched my eyes shut and quivered. This was is. He told me to breathe in through my nose and out through my mouth, and on the third breath, he did it. I kept my eyes closed, and was so worried about NOT looking like a wimp in front of my boyfriend, I didn't even feel it.
"All done" Rev said. "Is the jewelry in already and everything?" I still had my eyes closed. This got a few laughs from Rev and my boyfriend. "Yup! All done!" I opened my eyes, and they watered... not from pain, but from the enormous endorphin rush I had. Rev saw me and said, "Yeah, I know. It pinches," and he smiled. This may seem like just a comment, but it meant a lot. It was very validating, and it let me know that I wasn't the only one out there that freaked out.
Overall, the whole experience was great. Rev was friendly and knowledgeable. The shop was immaculately clean, literally, like a doctor's office! Exam table and all! This is the only place I've ever gone, and the only place I'll ever go... I've recommended it to several friends, all as happy as I was.
I've since got my tongue pierced, and have two ideas for tattoos stewing in my head, as well as an ear project. Needless to say, I've conquered my fear of needles! The best part is, I did it on my own, and couldn't be more proud of that.