All of my life, I have been shy . . . I never really fit in to any group, even as a little kid. I was most comfortable talking to adults, not kids my age. That feeling only intensified through high school. Unable to find other people who I felt that I could talk to, I was happiest when completely alone with myself, in the woods somewhere or riding horses. I thought when I first started to stretch my lobes that it would work to push me even farther away from other people, but I found that my modifications have helped to bring me closer to those around me and to the complete strangers that you meet in daily life.
At A Glance Author Virtuesplea Contact virtuesplea@gmail.com When Five years ago My first introduction to any even slightly unusual piercings and modifications would have been seeing stretched lobes in high school. Living in middle Delaware, my exposure to any body modification was almost nonexistent. My sister, who is an extremely extroverted person, had a few friends with stretched lobes. Not anything too extreme, I believe the person with the honor of having the largest lobes in the school had 00 ga. She went out and bought a pair of 14 ga cbrs, and, one night visiting our dad, she popped them in. I laugh now remembering how huge they looked to me, sure that I would never do anything like that. But within a few weeks, I began to see the beauty of these larger piercings, and, when she stretched up to 12's, I cleaned her 14's and put them into my own ears. And so started my stretching.
I remember the thrill of finally fitting my flared 2 ga tunnels into my lobes, and the whistling noise they made that cracked up my friends on the track team when I ran. I'd get strange looks at track meets . . . every athlete I met who asked about my lobes associated them with the rejects in the schools . . . the people they generally didn't like and didn't accept. It gave me a kick to show them that their stereotypes were wrong. Some of the most intelligent people in my school were those "rejects" . . . they just didn't fit in with the mainstream.
In the summer before my senior year of high school, I had 1/2" stretched lobes, and wanted to go bigger. My sister was frequenting a tattoo shop in the area, but it never even occurred to me that I could go somewhere to get my ear stretched further. By this time, I had started using tapers to stretch my ears, but the few places near me didn't have any tapers large enough for me to use. So I ended up going to the nearby art supply store looking for paintbrushes. That was an interesting trip in which I confused a couple store employees. When I arrived, I realized that I had no way to make sure that I bought the correct size of paintbrush. So I used a ruler from the store to measure the thicknesses of paintbrush handles. My only concerns were to find a paintbrush that was lacquered or finished in some way so as to prevent splinters, and to get as close to 5/8" (the size of the new plugs I had bought) without going under that size. To the store's credit, quite a few employees stopped by to help, although none of them had any idea what I needed the paintbrush for.
When I got home, I used a saw to remove the brush end of the paintbrush at the widest point of the handle. I then carefully sanded the end very smooth, concentrating on the edges. As a lubricant, I used a bottle of Astroglide, specially bought for that purpose, figuring that if it was safe for use during sex, my ears would be fine. I did one ear that first night, and did the other one a couple of weeks later. It took about an hour to get the taper through my lobe, going extremely slowly . . . I had seen pictures and read stories on BME of what could go wrong, and by that time I loved the way my stretched lobes looked and would have been heartbroken to lose them.
My sister ended up piercing each of my lobes two times, giving me three piercings in each ear (the first was pierced with a gun when I was a kid . . . never again now that I know the dangers). By the time that I graduated high school, I was now the kid with the largest lobes - 5/8", 2 ga, and 10 ga in each ear. Some time after I graduated, I ended up removing the back two piercings (although I now have a 6 ga in the second piercing in my right ear) - the third piercings were victims of bad placement (go to a professional!), too close to the cartilage to be comfortable after I started stretching them. The middle piercings I regretted taking out, and I now have a 6 ga in my right ear and plan to get the left re-pierced now that I've massaged it enough to get rid of the scar tissue from the initial piercing.
People's reactions to my piercings and tattoos continually amaze me. I read on BME bad experiences others have had because of their modifications (both more and less extreme than my own), but the worse reaction I've ever had was disgust, and only after I demonstrate that I can put a finger through my ears. Most often, I am asked about my motivations, but always politely. And the bonus part (not the best part, the happiness my modifications give me will always be the best part)? The intriguing and intelligent people I've meet and had the privilege of talking to because of either their mods or my own.