I was sitting in a McDonalds watching my 2-year-old son play with his Happy Meal's Matchbox car when it hit me - I had the money. I could go and get my tongue pierced!
At A Glance Author Snoof Contact Snoof@bme.anon When It just happened Artist Jackie Studio Pagan Ink Location Dunfermline, Fife, Scotland
Within ten minutes we were packed up and I was rolling the buggy through the tattoo-and-piercing parlour door. A young girl, face riddled with studs, greeted me and asked what I wanted.
Unfortunately, when she looked at my tongue she decided she didn't want to go for it. My tongue has veins all over and she was too worried about problems arising. She did helpfully point me in the direction of an Edinburgh parlour that might do it, but it'll be a while before I'll be able to now.
I thought for a moment and then said "I want one here..." pointing at a place above my second lobe piercing in my left ear, "two here..." pointing at the cartilage of the same ear, "...and a tragus on this side." with a perfunctory wave of my hand in the direction of my right ear.
She told me how much it would cost - £60 including jewelry - and I nodded. Her face lit up - I grinned, and we went for it.
First she did the upper lobe. I had only ever had piercings done with a gun and I was surprised at how much it hurt. But then when she pulled the ring through and began fastening the ball I was even more surprised at how quickly it stopped hurting.
I asked her to do both of the upper cartilage ones at a shot - one needle, then the other one - because I thought it would lessen the pain of her holding my freshly pierced-and-messed-with ear. I'm glad I had her do it that way - spang, spang, and that was five holes in one ear. Inside I was glowing while she pulled the hoops through and began fastening the balls, talking casually about my son, who was happily playing with his Matchbox and babbling sweetly along with the conversation.
As she finished up with my cartilage - it bled a little bit - we started talking about the tragus and the tattoo artist in the next booth over shouted "Jackie! Is that lady being a glutton for punishment?"
We laughed and I shouted back "I'm half Dutch, it's atonement for the Czechia match!"
We all laughed at that and then Jackie brought out the clamps. She hadn't clamped the other ones and I'd been told the clamp was the most painful bit of some piercings, so I was pretty curious when she approached me with it.
"Will this hurt as much as I've been told it does?" I asked, my poker face cleverly in place.
"No, because I clamp it and the clamp cuts off circulation a bit, so it'll probably hurt less"
It did, but it was still quite unpleasant. The crunching feeling and her wiggling the needle to get it through made my hair stand on end. It wasn't a matter of pain so much as it was a matter of nails-going-over-a-blackboard. Then she stuck the barbell through (I have a labret stud in my tragus, which will be switched to a shorter one when the swelling's gone down) and cleaned it up some and voila!
Happily, we headed into the front area so I could look at some rings (I lost the two rings from the bottom-most holes in my lobes a year or so ago and haven't been able to replace them yet) and as we were talking about them I felt my earlobe on the right side and it came away wet with blood.
"Do you have a tissue?" I asked Jackie, and she got me to walk back into the booth. It stopped bleeding after she cleaned it with Metal Metamorphosis and we walked back out. She gave me a bottle of Metal Metamorphosis to clean the piercings with and told me to buy some zinc tablets and clean my new piercings 4 times daily instead of 2 like the pamphlet suggested since I have so many new ones.
I thanked her and we walked back out. Mission diverted... But accomplished.
I clearly remember getting my other three holes (one in the right ear, two in the left) by gun and how my ears felt three times their normal size and throbbed with pain for literally days afterwards. With these, the pain stopped the second she stopped fiddling with the rings/stud. They haven't hurt at all - even when I inadvertently touched them while brushing back my hair - except while I cleaned them, and then only a little.
When I got home I cleaned them and the tragus bled a bit - all down my neck again; I'm a bleeder, so I'm pretty lucky to have bled as little as I did.
I'm quite happy with my new holes. I have vast plans for body modding (nothing extreme, a few holes, some tattoos, the usual) and it feels nice to have taken a few steps in the right direction.